Object relationships, Attachment and Dependency
Relations are generic and complex bonds of life and gaining the maximum mileage in any relation depends on our abilities to condition self as according to the emergent and dynamic needs in that relation. Unlike the chemical and physical relations which are fair and balanced, human relations are made out as intricately influenced by the interferences, orientations, perceptions and fancies of the individuals. We all are different and have distinct affinities and antipathies and when we enter into a special relationship like a marriage, then most of us take time to condition ourself according to the lifestyles of the other.
A fine resonance results only from a perfect mutual conditioning, which is seldom possible as most of us have deep seated charms for our own perceptions and ways of life. Relations sometimes loose fervor due to the prominence of ‘me’ in the relation and relegation of the thought of ‘our’. Under such situations person should try using ‘objectivity’ to understand relations better. Objectivity guides us to be realistic rather than fancied!
Let’s find out what objectivity is–
Objectivity is a perception offshoot of rationality which offers to make the situations clearer through removal of prejudices, biasing and fancies too. The picture that emerges is devoid of undue influences and only the factors and processes intrinsic to the situation are depicted. A logical attempt to understand the rational situation allows finding out the cause and effect theories involved therein. Now what does ‘objectivity’ in a relationship mean? Well the meaning transforms into a contradictory paradox. A relation which is defined by the fancies, opinions and perceptions has to be devoid of that so that ‘realism’ prevails and not the individual inclinations. However, the fact is that, objectivity is not always the want of the relation and if a juxtaposed consonance prevails between the two (like life partners) then there can’t be any aberrations and least would be the need of objectivity. In fact, fancies are the fuel of any relation and the greater the ‘accepted fancy’ quotient more would be the health of the relationship! So why attempt objectivity? Let’s find–
The need for objective perception in a relationship
When the consonances fail to touch the desired levels in any relation the latter starts to lose vitality as the force of cohesion weakens. The life partners, if not convinced and satisfied with the orientations and perception of each other, then more of the antipathy begin to breed between the two and which finally increases the divergences in the relation. Many couples break their relation after getting wholly non tolerant of one another.
Objectivity helps in such situations which could creep in the life of any couple and which involve more of the antagonistic or divergent fancies which crush the resonances that exist. Better is to avoid the fancies and get realistic and this is what the objectivity calls for. When the person gets objective, then he/she conditions self as according to the emergent situation by understanding the factors (of aberration primarily) and then work out the possible ways out. However, the inculcation of objectivity requires changes in the life behaviors and perceptions. What these changes are? These changes define the depth of objectivity. The most prominent ones are–
How is the individual conditioned through objectivity? The changes-
Objectivity requires the individual in the relation to find out the rational situations which are free from a personal influence and perceptions & which have to be otherwise shed if a neutral turf is to be developed. This neutral turf serves to sort out the inconsistencies in the relation which gets clogged due to this. In majority of the cases, it has been found that trivial matters of married life (or any relation) are made out as the life aberrations and these tend to break the relation. However, the objective analysis of the situation is characteristically based on downplaying, rather elimination the unconcerned factors which could be due to personal opinions about a thing. Having these removed, the person(s) realize that the relation is nowhere clogged and could be moved on without any major deviation or decision. The conditioning is however necessary and objectivity does this job done in no time. Yes, truly it is sometimes a matter of moments when the situation gets freed from the irrelevant and negative pulls.
The overall result–
The use of objectivity thus helps to understand our relations better so that we can carry on without any unwarranted implications. Small amount of occasional objectivity is enough to sort out the biggest generic problems in the relation. So, have a good time in your relation and if you seek more of the counsels than e-guides like http://magicofmakingupcourse.com/presentation_new/ offers vital insights as how objectivity can improve the quality of relations by weeding out the aberrations from it, which many a times you may find difficult to handle.
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